Saturday, July 3, 2010

Getting there.

It's been one of the worst weeks of my life, and I even feel bad complaining about it, because you weren't my loss. And to those who have lost you, I am genuinely sorry. You've heard this a thousand times, but a thousand and one never hurt anyone. You were my friend, I don't mean that. I just know there are more important people right now. It's all still so surreal. Aside from the tragedy itself, my best friend's face as he walked down the aisle, having to carry his girlfriend was the most horrifying image I have ever encountered, one which will never leave me, try as I may to escape from it. I'm proud of you, just so you know. Most people wouldn't have been able to do it. You stayed strong for her. Because of her. Nothing I can say will make this better. Which is shit, because making you feel better was the one thing I could always do. That's gone now. For how long? I don't know. Not too long, please. This is, after all, our last summer. She'd want us to enjoy it, just like she planned to. This is where we take over. We can fulfil the things she never got to.
Life is short, and often, shortened even further. You don't know when your last day is going to be. Live now, while you can. If someone means something to you, tell them now. However stupid it may be, because you don't know when you'll get another chance to. I'm infinitely sorry you had to be the example for us to live by, but hopefully now we can realise what we have, and learn to make the most of it. Going on, not moving on. Goodbye Ciara <3



This was like the only photo I could find of you alone, which says a lot about how selfless you were, really. Ily.

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